Unleash the Monkey Army

I've been thinking about training a bit recently. Partly inspired by the end of the indoor rowing "season" and partly on the back of a couple of  conversations I've been having.  The indoor rowing "season" is actually a year and runs from the 1st May. Having just come to the end of the 2015-16 season it seemed a good time for a  review. Top level, I completed 1.4 million metres over 108 hours of sliding up and down on the metal rail. Sounds like a lot of time in the same 8ft x 3ft but it's  significantly less time than I spend watching TV. Also, while it is two thirds of my recorded lifetime distance, it is a pretty moderate sort of distance for  most indoor rowers. That's not surprising, I don't have a long history of anything that would help me very much and while the physique I've been gifted and  enhanced with nutritional choices (good and bad) might have some uses, it is not one that you would look at and think "rower"...

On Saturday 9th April I went down to Exeter for only my second ever indoor rowing competition, the Fitness Matters Devon 1k and Team Relays . Competition is the official description, I never made any bones about being competitive! If this is your first visit to the blog, welcome! Long-time readers will no doubt be stunned to know that I've been giving the event some thought. Because I'm a caring sort of guy, I'll share those with you. The Concept 2 indoor rowing machine is pretty much the gold standard of rowing machines and has been setting the tone for 40 years now. If you've ever set foot in a gym you'll know what I mean. It looks something like this     and you're pretty much always guaranteed to be able to get on one, no matter how busy the gym is. There's a reason for that! They're pretty much despised by the gym cardio junkie and the meathead (and all stops in between) in equal measure. They're self-propelled but against resistance and am...

I’ve fallen into the clutches of a challenge again! You’d have thought by this stage in my life that I’d have outgrown the whole “I dare you” thing. And in truth, I have. I’m doing it because at some level it works for me. That is to say that at some level, I want to do it. That raises the uncomfortable realisation that what happens next is nobody’s fault but my own and the question “what is wrong with you?” The challenge is simple enough. From 10th November to Christmas Eve (44 days) you have to complete 30 Half-marathons (21,097m) on the indoor rower or Skierg. Simple, not easy. Fear not gentle reader, this isn’t interfering with the latest 100 day burpee ladder (last day 9th December). Granted I don’t think anybody has ever climbed off a rower and thought “Yeah, I know what would be belting right about now. 80 burpees.” Even if they’ve done said Half-marathon as slowly as I have. I was supposed to be in the home run towards a strongman competition in December too. M...

Let's recap. Ever a glutton for punishment, I allowed myself to get talked into entering an indoor rowing competition.  The appeal? I'd heard they've a great atmosphere, it would give me a target to work towards and it would be a chance to chance my arm in a pond slightly bigger than my utility room! I've never been that dedicated to, or hot on the erg [indoor rower]. And over the recent years have not invested a lot of time and energy into developing my fitness. Granted, I completed the burpee year but between April and 1st June, when I started the rower ladder, I did nothing which didn't look like picking something up and putting it down again (and, in truth, precious little of that)! In fact, it was that ladder and starting the dog days of summer  that led to the suggestion being made to me. So there I was, the day after my 2nd ever Strongman event, logging on, entering my payment details before thinking "Oh nuts, what have I done now?!" (n...