Scratching the surface...or your head

When you think about it, apart from alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, sugar and ego-onanism, quitting is easy!
Every day there are only 24 hours. Some are packed to the gunwales, some are padded out with fluff and filler. But every minute of every hour seems to compete for attention (or slip past under the radar, trying desperately not to be noticed!). Your best laid plans gang aglay with terrifying ease and the speed of a pyromaniac cheetah carrying a tank of nitrogen. There are a thousand and one reasons at any moment to not do something - whether it is deliver the difficult message or to avoid training or not order that pizza!
Every reason appears to have merit. Each has a weight and force of its own which will make it seem insurmountable or incontrovertible. In truth though, you only need one reason to do it. One good "why" to set you straight. That's all it need but too often we are blinded by the sandstorm of negativity to pick it out. Maybe we have never really identified it before and at this moment, under pressure, that sort of exploration seems fraught with danger.
Quelle dommage? Actually, it is an insidious danger. It's the whisper from the dark shadows of the mind. The honey-worded turncoat who spits poison in your mind's eye - "you're not ready"; "you're not good enough"; "you're not deserving of this"; "you're under-prepared"; "you're too weak"; "you're too tired" or whatever.
This is mental Dane-Geld. Once you have ceded, it is difficult to stay strong, to say "no" or "enough". And we hide behind the fact that "we could do it but for...". But precisely because it is difficult, and precisely because we have given in before, we do it again. And now we turn up the volume on that inner trickster. Your personal god of mischief starts to swell, fuelled by the auto-affirming flow of feedback from each concession.
It is difficult to fight. Difficult but not impossible. It can dominate your destiny but it need not do so if you are prepared to pay the entry price. It's quite an "if" and disappointing is the knowledge that nobody can make you pay that price but you. Somebody may be able to say something which sparks a recognition that it is worth while to you. However, at the heart of the matter is whether you really want it. For any great inspiration is only ever fanning the flames from your inner spark. If you don't want it at some level, nobody will be able to make you do it.
And the sad part of that bombshell? It's all down to you. Personal responsibility! Or "PFR" as it is known in these parts!
To take that on we need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. We need to get used to disappointment. Not to wallow in, nor to meekly accept, but to face the fact that it is an ever-present, waiting to land on us given half a chance. To what end? To know that if you don't want that, you will either need to work (as there are no free rides) or adjust what you will accept. Above all, it is to know that you can endure, that hope still remains in the box


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